What We Say When (we think) Nobody’s Listening — A Conversation Among Women
The most fun thing about being a woman is talking about everything. And when we’re in the company of other women, washing down dark chocolate truffles with a really smooth Merlot, we’ll basically sound like a combination of profanity, trashy romance novel and the best Margaret Cho set you’ve ever heard. Wanna know what we say when (we think) nobody’s listening?
Girl A: “God my Crossfit instructor is hot!” she giggles. “I’d do him.”
Girl B, with both hands running through her hair, looking a bit desperate: “Oh. My. God! Bill and I haven’t had sex in two years! Two fucking years!”
Girls A and C together in a high-pitched unison: “No! Really? Oh my God-ah! We need to fix that!”
Girl A: “Every time I go work out I just want to touch his pecs,” motioning a good pec squeeze with both hands.
Girl B: With a sadder tone, “I don’t know what to do, things suck right now. He’s working all the time and I’m running around after the kids and we just don’t have any time together anymore. When we do, we’re too tired to do anything about it.”
Girls A and C in matching sad tone: “I get it.”
Girl A with an indignant tone: “Why don’t you try the Rabbit and have a little fun with yourself. Fuck Bill.”
Girl B: “I don’t own anything like that,” looking down at her shoes.
Girls A and C gasp and say, “What, no toys?!”
By now all three women, friends for the last twenty years, companions in weddings, childbirths, career changes and sex toy shopping are on their third glass of merlot. They’ve both laughed and cried in the last forty five minutes. They’ve talked about waxing their vaginas and what size their new breasts are. They’ve worked out every problem their teenagers have and have started on world peace.
Girl A: “Have either of you done a Brazilian?” Gesturing like Vannah White toward her situation.
Girl B: “Oh my God, I’d never do that!”
Girl C simultaneously with the same loudness: “Totally!”
Girl A to C: “Does it hurt? Don’t you feel like a nine year old girl with no hair?”
Girl C very enthusiastically: “I love it. Makes me feel sexy. Plus less friction during sex. You should try it!”
Girl B: “I think Max is on his way out. We might have to put him down soon.”
Girls A and C: “Awe, I’m so sorry.”
Girl B: “Yeah, he’s 14, so I guess he’s had a great life, but still, he was around before we had kids, you know?”
Girl A: “Totally get it. I’m here for you if you need anything.”
Girl C: “You know Mary’s sister died of breast cancer last week. They didn’t expect it so soon. I don’t know what Barry and the kids are going to do without her. It’s so sad.”
Girls A and B sigh together and pause. “Yes, oh my God, so sad,” Says A.
Girl B sliding her wine glass under the bottle her friend is tipping her way: “Life’s so short. We need to talk about our bucket list. What’s on your guys lists?”
Girl A: “Totally going skydiving for my 50th.”
Girl C: “I want to have a New York Times best selling book!”
Girl B: “I want to have sex again.”
Women can let anything into their conversation and they can hold several topics at once. They understand the emotion, allow themselves to feel it and then give themselves permission to move on.
At this point the girls have ordered a gourmet pizza to soak up some of the alcohol and have moved from the bar to the couch-like chairs in the corner. They’ll continue like this until one of them has to pee and then they’ll follow each other into the bathroom, talking through the stall doors about penises, hysterectomies, unnatural urges and that hot guy at the gym. All while the stranger in the stall next to them finishes her business.
Women thrive on the business of other women, good or bad. But they also know how to listen, know what to say, and know how to be there when there’s nothing left to say. Good women lift each other up, save them from drowning and get them to remember who they are. Great women are therapists, cheerleaders, teachers, mentors, and mothers, all in one. They come alive in the company of each other. They call to each others souls.
This little blog is in honor of my friends Shelly and Jill, who may or may not own sex toys, but definitely have been through the fire with me in the last twenty years. I love you both. Let’s keep talking.
What do you say with your girls when (you think) nobody’s listening?
Laura Di Franco, MPT is a holistic physical therapist, published author, poet, blogger and black belt with over two decades of experience in healing. Her transformational programs combine the empowering tools of body awareness and therapeutic writing to help you learn the language of your intuition and gain the clarity you crave for your life and business. Laura’s enthusiasm is contagious and the spark that’ll inspire you to make the change you’ve been afraid to make. She’s the sherpa you’ve been looking for! Want a workshop that’ll give you practical powerful tools you can use today? Find them at www.BraveHealer.com And more free inspiration on my Facebook page HERE.