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Photo by S A R A H ✗ S H A R P on Unsplash

Forget Positive Thinking. There’s Something Better.

The positive thinking movement got us on the right track but it’s positive feeling that’s the real power behind everything you desire. Let’s explore this and get you to the point of mastering the mind-body practice of feeling good, rather than just thinking good.

I was sitting in my hot tub this evening staring at the sky and the almost-full, bright yellow moon, thinking holy shit my life is amazing. I was lucky enough to see Anne Lamott and Eve Ensler last night at Strathmore in Maryland and I was feeling really inspired and amazing about my mission.

Seriously, it felt that good. And the idea came to me…thinking good thoughts is cool and all, but feeling good; just conjuring up awesomeness right there in your moment, beats thinking any day of the week.

Last night Anne said, “Expectations are resentments under construction.” I chewed on that all night and into today and then into the hot tub this evening. If I wasn’t allowed to expect anything good, then how was I to manifest?

Have you all read the book, The Secret, or watched the movie? You should, it’s a positive thinking 101 lesson. But then came the real secret, The Power. Rhonda Byrne figured out the power behind The Secret. Love. A feeling. You should go read that book too.

I’ve loved the idea of positive thinking my whole life. It seemed like such a great alternative to its opposite; negative thinking. I mean, why waste your time thinking bad things? Seriously, it’s a downer.

But I always waited around for something to feel good about. I could force myself to think positive thoughts, but the feeling didn’t always follow. Why? Because I was waiting for proof. Positive affirmations and thoughts are powerful little buggers. They can change the game. But positive feelings? Whoa, you better be ready for the magic.

So I’m sipping my Yellowtail Shiraz in the hot tub this evening getting ready for a huge event this week in New York and I’m feeling fucking fabulous. What’s not to love when you’re hot tubbing with wine at dusk and the moment is yours for the feeling? I’m sitting there swirling around in the water and remembering one of my coaches saying to me, “Water is a spiritual medium you know,” and smiling to myself.

And it dawned on me (like this whole blog idea)…the idea one of the hot mamas of spirituality and positivity, Esther Hicks, preaches…it’s the feeling that matters the most. So we ought to get to feeling good. Like now. Like. Right. Now. What can you conjure up right this very blog-reading moment? How about some joy? Bliss? Ecstasy? Gratitude? Come on, play with this a bit.

I get it Esther. And I do believe I’m finally feeling it; the love, the joy, the gratitude…just fucking because. No other reason needed.

Y’all, I’m telling you to try this.

Now you may be sitting in your tiny little, cluttered, dirty apartment with way too many bills to pay and a headache the size of Montana parked in the back of your noggin thinking, how do I just feel good when this just sucks?

And that would be the trick, right? It’s one thing to feel good when all is well (and you own a hot tub) and it’s quite another thing to just feel good when there’s nothing to feel good about. This is a mindset practice. And it’s a gratitude practice. And it’s an awareness practice. And all of those things will lead to the choice you get to feel whatever the Hell you feel like feeling…right now.

With awareness you get a choice. Even with a headache. Even with clutter. Even with bills. Take a deep, long, slow breath. We’re you able to do that? Cool. So. Fucking. Cool. Really now, didn’t that feel good?

The possibility of feeling good happens with the connection to the body. And it’s the reason thinking our way there never works.

It’s so damn boring to feel bad. I’m tired of feeling afraid, sad, bad, unworthy, not good enough, unloved, and under appreciated. Thing is, all of those things are only what I make them mean. In any given moment it’s up to me to feel something different. To connect with the sensations and then create one for myself. And because there’s always something to be grateful for (no matter what situation you’re in) you can always choose to put your focus on that.

The practice of positive feeling and being in control of that on a daily basis will change your life. You’ll become an unstoppable force of love. Your life will begin to change as you attract the energy of your feelings to you in the form of people and experiences. It’s going to take a fierce discipline and you’re going to have to check in with your mind and body for signs of resistance often. We were taught not to feel. We were taught to think our way through life and solve the problems that way.

What if thinking is only part of the answer? What if feeling was the key all along?

Laura Di Franco, MPT won’t let you settle for a mediocre life. Your health, wealth and happiness is one Brave Healing book, poem, workshop, strategy session or moment away. With almost three decades of expertise in holistic physical therapy, six books and a third-degree black belt in Tae Kwon Do, Laura’s energy and method are contagious and unlike anything you’ve experienced. She’s the owner of Brave Healer Productions at www.BraveHealer.com

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